It is once again time for praise for the wise and poop for the idiotic.
Yet again, Gwyneth Paltrow has bestowed upon us the travails of her body. She says that losing her baby weight has been the most difficult thing she has ever done in her life. Wow. She must lead quite a charmed life, no? Either that or perhaps the movie she starred in called “Shallow Hal” influenced her pretty dramatically. Catcalls to Gwynnie for placing such emphasis on her image, and the stupidity to publicize her “hardship”.
Glenn Beck has been doing commercials for a while now on a company that promotes gold investments. I have seen this infomercial many times on television. It scared the daylights out of me. So why is it not a surprise that this company, Goldline, is now under investigation for fraud, having many clients who lost their pants after investing with this enterprise? From mortgages that require no down payment to Bernie Madoff to an oil industry that is allowed to drill deep water wells without having sufficient technology or contingencies in case of a spill, the old adage, “If it is too good to be true, it is”, still holds. My only question regarding these fraud charges against Goldline is: who didn’t see this coming? Catcalls to Glenn Beck for going for the money instead of the cents (sense).
I am sure by now you have all heard of Sarah Palin’s penchant for creating her own vocabulary. This week, she made up a non-existent word and used it on Twitter. Then she had the gall to say that William Shakespeare also invented words! Oy vey. Let’s just allow her to keep talking. The greater implication of her babble though, is that her speech faux pas are indicative of a disorderly, undisciplined mind. Her conceptual thinking, her attempts at meaningful ideas, are just as lacking as as her outward speech patterns. No news there. Some funny responses on Twitter have surfaced in response to our Sarah’s creative use of words. The site’s name is Shakespalin:
Boos and hisses to our Sarah for her continuing lack of intellectual development, and her attempts to cover up that laziness by using bravado.
Of course, the apple does not fall from the tree. Bristol and Levi have now demanded a full-season guarantee to a reality show being developed for this duo. Crazy kids! The hypocrisy, irony and plain old venal and mercenary intentions seem to run in the Palin blood. Ruth Marcus, in the Washington Post today, lays out the excellent probability of Bristol following her mother’s illustrious footsteps. This article is not only spot on about the pathology of the child-rearing practices of the Palin family, but also it is damn funny. What a role model our Sarah is. It is as simple as imprinting, “monkey-see, monkey-do”, and the most basic of urges for a child to want to emulate a parent. Either our Sarah is oblivious to these most fundamental principles of human behavior, or she chooses to just ignore them for the sake of financial lucre. Thus, her Bristol is following suit. Choices, my friends, are what makes up a life of worth. Our Sarah has chosen despicable, contra-indicated family values to act upon and pass on to her vulnerable brood, although I must admit that Bristol is not an innocent kid anymore and should be using her own sense to weigh important life decisions. Oh yeah: but look at whose knee she was at when learning valuable lessons. Once again, catcalls to our Sarah for subverting her mantra of family values to the antithetical rout, as if her strict moral protocol does not apply to her personally. Especially when money is involved.
Kudos to Senator Lindsey Graham for his “Yes” vote for Elena Kagan in the Senate Judiciary Committee hearings. In this particular circumstance, Graham overcame his partisanship and did what he thought was right. He refused to allow party politics to muddy the importance, and his gut feeling, about this Supreme Court nominee. His comments:
What’s in Elena Kagan’s heart is that of a good person who adopts a philosophy I disagree with,” Graham said. “She will serve this nation honorably, and it would not have been someone I would have chosen, but the person who did choose, President Obama, I think chose wisely.
Compliments to the media for their insightful research on demographics and specific recommendations to bettering our citizens’ lives. We all know how tough this recession has been, especially on the younger generation, just out of college and searching for jobs. The Brookings Institute came out with a study of the most educated cities in the nation. Likewise, Business Week unveiled a study of the best cities for the newly graduated. If you pair these two articles, Denver or Minneapolis look pretty good for settlement and making your mark on the world. Gotta leave the coasts. There’s gold in that middle of the country!
I owe thanks and kudos to my friend Ms. Seven Striper for her impeccable sense of humor and insight:
John was in the fertilized egg business.
He had several hundred young layers (hens), called ‘pullets,’ and ten roosters to fertilize the eggs.
He kept records, and any rooster not performing went into the soup pot and was replaced.
This took a lot of time, so he bought some tiny bells and attached them to his roosters.
Each bell had a different tone, so he could tell from a distance, which rooster was performing.
Now, he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report by just listening to the bells.John’s favorite rooster, old Butch, was a very fine specimen, but this morning he noticed old Butch’s bell hadn’t rung at all!
When he went to investigate, he saw the other roosters were busy chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing, but the pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would run for cover.
To John’s amazement, old Butch had his bell in his beak, so it couldn’t ring.
He’d sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one.
John was so proud of old Butch, he entered him in the Saint Lawrence
County Fair and he became an overnight sensation among the judges.The result was the judges not only awarded old Butch the “No Bell Piece Prize,” but they also awarded him the “Pulletsurprise” as well.
Clearly old Butch was a politician in the making. Who else but a politician could figure out how to win two of the most coveted awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the unsuspecting populace and screwing them when they weren’t paying attention.
Vote carefully this fall, the bells are not always audible.
And last but not least, my friend Lilleyhope sent me this video on the essence of a Yiddishe Mama, a Jewish Mother. Kudos to this charming oldster for being so honest:
I am off to the “woods” for a couple of weeks. I promise you some great photo essays, as well as typical Yo Mama words.
Tags: best U.S. cities for the newly graduated, Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston following in Sarah's footsteps, commercials for Goldline, Glenn Beck, Gwyneth Paltrow body image, Lindsey Graham's vote for Elena Kagan, losing baby weight, most educated cities in America, Sarah Palin destruction of the English language, Shakespalin, Yiddishe Mama